Chapter 3 – AND
Adni FF
Adni FF, IPK3, Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon, Entrapment, Advay Singh Raizada, Chandini Yash Narayan Vashisht.
“Did you sleep well?” Shikha coed at the girls, once Chandini came back, with one child in her arms, and the other holding the edge of her saree, while rubbing her eyes.
“This is your Shikha Maasi and this is Veer Mausaji…namaste karo.”
“Chacha. I am your Chacha.”
Chandini smiled, but gazed at her daughters, as the two girls joined their hands.
Shikha giggled at them. “So who’s who?”
“I am Advaya Singh Raizada,” The child in Chandini’s arms answered first, while resting her head on her mother’s shoulder.
“And I am Advini Singh Raizada.” The child hiding behind her mother answered.
“Maa I am thirsty,”Advaya whined.
“Will you like milk?’
“Chocolate milk please?’
“Okay,” Kissing her cheek, Chandini carried her to the kitchen, while Advini sprinted behind her.
Advay stood at the balcony fighting his urge to turn around and look at his daughters. He didn’t want to startle them, given they didn’t know who he was. And given how scary he must look in his long unruly hair, and unkempt beard.
But he wanted to talk to them. To watch them smile. He wanted to see how much of Chandini they had in them.
But how was he meant to introduce himself ?…. To his daughters? He tore apart his hair… Since when did a father need to have to introduce himself to his children? Where had he landed himself? And why? Why had he done all that he had.
And while he contemplated and battled, the girls sprinted back again, and he stood still, not wanting to miss even a squeak or a whisper.
“So how old are they?” Shikha asked, once they settled on the sofa, with one child still on Chandini’s lap and the other hiding behind her, while sipping on their hot chocolate.
“A little over three and a half.”
“I cannot believe how similar they look.” Chandini laughed as Shikha leaned forward and gazed at the two girls in awe.
“It was a surprise, a pleasant surprise.”
“How do you tell them apart?” Veer too frowned from one girl to another.
“I don’t know.” Chandini nuzzled her nose to the child on her lap, and the kissed the temple of the one beside her and chuckled. “I can tell them apart. They are so different to each other.”
“Are they? How?”
“Hmm.” She smoothed back the hair of the child on her lap. “This one is my Adu, Advaya, she takes completely after her Papa.” She bit her lip as she glanced at the man still with his back to her. “Like her Papa, she is bold, fearless.”
“And strong.” The little child added with a giggle.
“Yes, and strong.” Chandini kissed her plush on her mouth when she pouted for her.
“And is this one like you then?” Shikha shifted closer, and stroked the cheek of the child beside Chandini.
“Hmm.” Stroking the other daughter’s hair, Chandini frowned. “No Vinu is like her Papa too. Very emotional like her Papa. Thoughtful too. And perceptive. But yes, she’s sensitive like me, and quiet, and most importantly she is very well-behaved, just like me. ”
A snicker from the man out on the balcony made her scowl. Dev Kahin kaa, she muttered under her breath as she glared at his broad delicious back. What would he know how quiet she was, and well behaved too. Unlike this other little clingy monkey who had taken after her father.
“Why Jiji? Why didn’t you come back?” Shikha choked. “You didn’t think of us? Of me, Baba, Meghu. Maasi”
“I did.” She snapped, yet choked, “I thought of all of you everyday…..but…”
“But?”
“You know why I didn’t come back.” She glared at her sister, wanting to ask her if she had forgotten all about the heartless conditions her husband had laid before her before he’d married her.
Besides how was she meant to return with two children when her husband had demanded a divorce from her. And on the other hand her mother had planned on handing her away to Karan in exchange of money, and she could never forgive her for that, or Karan.
“You didn’t come back because….” Once it dawned upon Shikha, she shot her horrified glare to an equally stunned Veer, before glancing out to her brother-in-law who was yet to turn around.
“You should have come back, Bhabhi.” Veer sniffled his tears. “You could always count on me. You knew you could.”
“I couldn’t.” She smiled. “You know how people in our city are…”
“But…”
“I had to think of Shikha. Of my daughters too.” She leaned to kiss Shikha’s cheek, before she gazed at Veer. “Had I know you were there for my Shikha maybe I would have…” But she pondered on that for a moment. “Hmm….no maybe not even then…no.”
“How Jiji.” Shikha finally choked, and Chandini wiped her sister’s tears. “How did you manage all these years?”
“Life teaches you Shikha.” She let out a wry chuckle “When you have two children in your arms and nowhere to go, you learn to survive.”
Tears glistened in Shikha’s eyes, but everyone stiffened when they heard Advay blow out a heavy sigh.
Everyone but Chandini, who cuddled her daughter and nuzzled her cheek again.
“Bhabhi,” Veer finally pursed his lips, and glanced at Shikha before holding Chandini’s gaze. “Can I ask you a question if you don’t mind?”
“Hmm.”
“Are you married?”
Stunned, Chandini raised a brow, and then she burst into a laugh, while touching her hand to her mangalsutra. “Do I look ‘not married’ to you?”
Shikha and Veer exchanged worried glances, while glancing again at Advay, wondering if he was listening to all this.
“So, you are married.”
“Of course, I am.” She chuckled.
“Where is your husband?” Shikha shifted nervously. “What time will he home?”
Chandini pursed her lips, contemplating on that question for a couple of beats. But she had nothing to lose by telling the truth.
“My husband is here.” She finally glanced at the tall man standing stiff on her balcony. “I am married to the man my father handed me to. I am married to the only man I’ve ever been married to. To the father of my girls….although I know the marriage must have been long dissolved…legally.”
She kept her gaze to her cuticles and frowned. What if she wasn’t married to him on paper, she had no value for legal paperwork. As far as she was concerned, there were not rites or rituals to undo a marriage, and according to the norms of her religious faith, she would forever be married to him.
But she knew he had married and moved on. And that too was another reason why she hadn’t returned.
A few feet from her, Advay stood staring into oblivion, shaking, trembling at her words.
She was still his wife.
He wanted to turn around, to hold her, to kiss her, to love her, to make love to her…. all night.
He just wanted to take his wife and his daughters home and start all over again. But he was not sure how …. How was he meant to make this right? How was he meant to undo all that he had done?
“But that shirt… and those shoes?” He frowned when Shikha spoke.
“So I don’t feel like I don’t have a man in the house,” Chandini whispered.
Advay bit hard into his lip, holding on to his tears, yet they fell.
After a few minutes of awkward silence, Shikha sighed again as she gazed at the two children leaning into their mother. “I can’t believe how similar they look.”
“Hmm.”Chandini chuckled, while kissing her daughters on her forehead. “They are identical.”
“No. To him. I meant how similar they look to Jiju.”
Chandini stilled for a beat, but lowered her gaze to the child on her lap again. They were both a spitting image of their father.
She rested her cheek on her daughter’s head, thankful they were both so similar to him, or she wouldn’t have know how she would have survived for four and half years without him.
When she gazed at her child again, the little girl smiled back at her, and she quickly kissed that smile, the smile that was her darling Janki Maa’s, and her Dev’s, and now her daughters’ too.
And as she peeked to her side, out of the balcony, although he had his back to her, she knew he was listening to everything, and she blushed at that thought of how he must feel to know his daughters took after him.
And true to her thought, Advay stood with his fingers digging into the railing of the balcony, his eyes pouring down with tears, and his heart beating rapidly in joy at what he was hearing.
His wife still belonged to him. And his daughters took after him. He had to see them now. He had to turn. He had to take them in his arms and kiss them till eternity.
And just as he was about to turn.
“Maa.” He heard one of his girls whisper. “Who is that?”
Advay stilled, his entire body froze in attention, as his ears perked to hear what she had to say to that. His nails dug deeper into the peeling paint of the railing, his heart waiting, before deciding whether to beat again or not. Her answer would now define their relationship. It would define whether there was still hope or not.
He expected her to say he was a friend, a relative, Shikha’s brother.
But after a few painful minutes of silence when she whispered, “That is your Papa.” Advay broke into a sob.
Papa, the word was so sweet, yet it punched him in his gut. Two girls, and she had managed all by herself. He should have been there for her, beside her. He should have been there for his children. Instead, he had made a complete mess out of his life, and the lives of his wife and his daughters too.
“Why is standing there?” the child asked again.
Advay wanted to turn. But his tears wouldn’t stop, and neither did he have the courage to look either his wife, or his children in the eye.
What was he meant to tell him if they asked where he’d been all this while? How was he meant to explain why their mother had left his hand that cold winter’s morning? And what would he have done with himself had Chandini not survived and had he found out later that she had been pregnant when she had let go of his hand?
So many questions now pricked his heart, and his soul too, and he continued wiping his tears, but they continued to fall, till he felt a strong clasp on his shoulder.
“Bhai.” Veer’s warm voice made him sniffle. “You need to come inside.”
Nodding, he wiped his face again, but when his gaze met with his brother’s, he broke into another sob.
“Its okay Bhai.” Veer patted his back, and he was grateful at how understanding and practical his little brother was. “Come, they are waiting for you.”
This time he chuckled. Of course they were waiting. And he had been for them, for so long time.
Wiping his face again, he sniffled and straightened himself. It was time to face his family, to face his daughters, to face her— his Chandini, his wife, his life too, and his reason to smile again.
As soon as he stepped into the tiny living room, he found Chandini clutch the child and tremble. He stopped for moment, worried he was making her nervous. But when she was peeked at him and shifted on her seat, he chuckled. Four and half years, and his slave still fidgeted to sit as an equal before her master.
“Stay.” Although he didn’t mean to, the word came out as a command, and Chandini instantly settled back, but kept her gaze trained to her feet.
But keeping his gaze on her, he collapsed on the single sofa beside her, and waited for her to peek at him. But an awkward silence crept into the room again, and he didn’t know how to break the ice.
The child in Chandini’s arms however, gazed at him with curious eyes, and Advay smiled, wondering what her name was.
She hopped out of her mother’s lap, and stumbled towards him. And before he knew what was happening, she had climbed on top of his lap.
A gasp escaped his throat, and he watched her, stunned at the ease with which she approached him, like she had known him all her life. But she did. He was her father after all. Did the blood that ran in her veins, recognise him?
“Are you crying?” He sighed when she spoke in that sweet singing voice, just like her mother’s.
And when she put her tiny little hands around his neck, he muffled back a sob.
But she moved closer, and kissed him on his cheek, one after the other. “Is that better?” she asked.
Advay nodded softy. Better? It felt like he had died and woken up in heaven.
While he had been struggling on how to introduce himself to his children, his child had not just approached him with such abandon, but was now kissing his cheek again as more tears flowed down.
Was she like him? He searched her face. Perhaps her features were. But her heart was just like her mother’s, like his Chandu’s, easy to love, easy to forgive. A girl with a golden heart.
He kissed her back, and cuddled her to his heart, and when he glanced at Chandini again, his eyes caught the big wide eyes of the other child hiding behind Chandni.
Smiling, he put his hand out to her. And gapsed when, she too, without a moment’s hesitation took his hand and stumbled into his arms.
But instead of sitting on his lap, she squeezed herself in the space between him and the sofa. Resting her chin on his chest, she gazed at him with devoted eyes.
He leaned to kiss her on her forehead, and then glanced at Shikha to find her wiping her tears.
“I fell in the playground and hurt my knee today at school.” Advaya, the child on his lap lifted her skirt for him.
Advay hissed at the way her knee had scraped. The blood had clotted, but he put his hand on her knee and hissed again when she flinched ever so slightly.
“Does it hurt?” Although he kissed her forehead, his tear-filled gaze moved to Chandini, at the memory of that evening after the Maha-arti when she had sat on his lap resting her head on his chest, and they had together watched the lights he had got Raghu and the kids to light for her.
And when Chandini wiped her tears and lowered her eyes, he knew she too was transported to that same moment when it had all began, when he still had it all in his hand, before squandering away like the way he had.
“Its hurts.” His daughter’s sweet voice made him shift his gaze to her again.
“But my Maa says I am a strong girl…like my Papa.” She kissed his cheek again.
Chuckling at his sweet little child, as Advay glanced at Chandini, he found her knotting her fingers while blushing to herself.
What’s your name?” he asked the child.
“Advaya .. because I am like my Papa.”
He kissed her cheek, on both sides.
“Are you my Papa?” The other child with her chin still resting on his chest, asked him while gazing at him with adorable eyes.
This was the first time she had spoken, and he sighed at how sweet she sounded too.
“Yes I am.” Advay’s gaze flickered to Chandini again.
But hopping out of the sofa, the child clutched to his hand and dragged him.
“What?” he chuckled.
“Come with me.”
Advay glanced at Chandini, not sure where it was his daughter was taking him. But when she peeked at him, yet kept her head down, he got up to his feet and followed his girls, into the bedroom.
With one sweeping gaze, he noticed there was a door to one side, the bathroom perhaps. A double bed rested against the wall, along with double wardrobe, in front of which was the white shirt that was still hanging.
“Here.” When the girls dragged him, he gasped the moment he turned to his side, and found a life size frame, with his picture inside it.
His heart stopping all over again, he slowly stumbled forward, and frowned at the picture, wondering where she had acquired it from.
He was in a suit, with his beard on, perhaps from google. From his company website, he wasn’t sure. But it had to be from a few years ago, given how stern and angry he looked. And how his eyes too glittered with evil, and weren’t lost and barren like they were now.
As he stood before his portrait and gazed at his previous self, he smiled to find himself in her bedroom. Whatever it was she still loved him, there was no doubt there. His hope returned to his heart all over again.
“You are my Papa.” The little girl at his feet stretched her hands out for him, and he scooped her into his arms without wasting a beat.
But as he leaned to kiss her cheek, much to his surprise, she kissed him plush on his mouth, making his gasp.
With his eyes blurring with his tears, he kissed her back, on her mouth, and her cheek too, and crushed her to his chest.
“Me too.” The other child tugged his shirt.
“Yeah, you too.” Yet once he carried her in his arms and tilted his face to kiss her mouth, she turned her face away.
Bloody little cheek, he thought, but kissed her cheek anyways….and now he couldn’t tell them apart all over again, and as though it wasn’t bad enough they looked like mirrors of each other, their mother had put them in exactly the same dress, and had even done their hair alike.
But he would learn too, he nodded, soon he would tell them apart.
“Papa.” He sighed when one of his girls called to him.
“I like you more than the picture.”
“Do you …why is that?”
“You are warm… and hard.”
“And you are soft.” He leaned to kiss her on her cheek, and she giggled when his beard tickle her.
“May I touch your beard?” She asked.
And as he nodded, he frowned at how well-behaved she really was.
“It’s soft,” She giggled glancing at her sister, “Adu its soft.”
Advaya too rubbed her hand against his cheek and giggled, while Advay chuckled at the two of them, welling at how perfect his life was all over again. Four and a half years gained back in less than five minutes.
As he finally strode back to the living room, his gaze met with Chandini, and he gazed at her with all the love in his heart at what he had found in her bedroom, while she lowered her head and bit into her lips.
“Papa, will you come to my school?” One of his daughters asked as soon as he slumped back into his chair. He was going to have to get coloured bands to differentiate them.
“I will my darling,” he replied anyways, and she instantly clapped before wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him on his mouth again.
He frowned, and glanced at Chandini.
“That’s Vinu,” she whispered, as though reading his mind.
“Will you tell us a story tonight?” the other girl asked.
Advay glanced at Chandini again, not knowing how to reply to that question. Tell them a story to bed? He wanted to stay, he wanted to move in if he could, but what did she want?
“I want a prince and princess story.” Vinu pouted at him.
“I doesn’t know any prince princess stories my darling.” He kissed her mouth when she anxiously raised her face to his again.
“You must know some story, Papa?”
“Papa knows a story of a frog.”
“Chee we don’t want frog stories,”
As the girls continued their banter with their father, Chandini peeked to her side, and furiously knotted the edge of her dupatta, at the sight of her darling daughters kissing and cuddling him. And when her Vinu kissed him on his mouth again, she pouted.
Traitors they were, both of them. Just like her body and her heart too. He seemed to have everything and everyone under his command, like always. And she perhaps stood to lose everything, like always.
When her children had asked who he was, she hadn’t had it in her to distract them, given she was certain he’d shrug them off as unwanted pest. But now that he kissed and cuddled them with such love and devotion, she shivered.
Was this why he had come hunting her down to Rishikesh?
Was his wife unable to have children? Was he here to take her daughters away from her?
As fear once again settled within her, she blinked her tears and forced a smile at her sister. Whatever it was, he was here, and her daughters were laughing in his arms, and he had every right to them, like she did. But most importantly they had every right to him, like they had to her.
“I’m starting dinner.” She smiled at Shikha. “Is there anything you’d like to eat?”
“Nood..”
“No, Bhabhi,” Veer replied even before Shikha finished her sentence. “Please don’t bother. We’re meant to be leaving soon.”
“Arey, aisey kaisey.” Chandini glared at him. “Its getting late. And why eat elsewhere, when I’m here.”
“But…”
“Its okay.” Shikha nudged him, before throwing a furtive glance at Advay. “Look at him.”
And the two of them sighed, at how relaxed Advay looked after such a long time. And happy too, as he tickled and whispered to his daughters, making them giggle.
“Come on Shikha…please have dinner with us,” Chandini urged.
While Shikha batted her eyes to her husband, he blew out a sigh. “Fine Bhabhi, but please don’t bother. We’ll have whatever you were meant to be having.”
“What were you planning on having?” shikha asked.
But Chandini’s eyes lit up. “My little monkeys want Noodles tonight.”
“Noddles.” Shikha too squealed and clapped like a child, and Chandini broke into laugh.
“Tho noodles it is them.” Veer kissed his wife’s temple and chuckled.
“Great, come I’ll help you.” Shikha got up to her feet.
“And I’ll just be back in ten minutes.” Veer too got up to his feet, but he glanced at his brother with longing again. “Bhai, you want to come?”
“No.” Advay crushed both his girls to his heart and shook his head. “I’m not going anywhere now. I am staying here, forever.”
____
Author’s note
Chapter three is here. The two girls are such sweethearts. SIGH! Finally there is something to feel so good about in the Entrapment world.
Love Chitra