Chapter 2 – AND Adni FF

Adni FF

Adni FF, IPK3, Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon, Entrapment, Advay Singh Raizada, Chandini Yash Narayan Vashisht.

Hey Mahadev, Chandini’s heart stopped, started, it danced, shivered, collapsed, and it did all of that all over again.

How had she failed her god that he had sent this storm back into her life?

With every brush of his chest to her back, a thousand jolts of electric impulses rippled across her, and she shuddered like the flags on top of the Himalayan temples left out to battle the gale force winds of the mountains.

But he was no gale force wind, he was a storm, a tornado, and he was right behind her, smelling as delicious as always, and looking as sinfully gorgeous in a dhoti as always, and luring her in with those dark deadly lust-filled eyes as always.

And he was here to wreck the very foundations of the life she had crafted for herself.

She had known that sooner or later she would have to come face-to-face with her monster, but little had she known that today was that day.

This was so sudden, so unexpected, and if only he could stop walking so close to her, lest she lean back into his chest and do something as stupid as gaze back at him with longing, or worse get up on her toes and kiss his delectable mouth.

With her heart beating like drums in her ears, as Chandini clutched tight to her sleeping child in her arms, she froze to the spot as soon as her eyes met with the warm grinning face of the other stunning man before her— Shaheer Shiekh, Mahaveer Kashyap, their Micku.

A smile stretched her lips, and she instantly glanced over her shoulder to hold Advay’s gaze. But she also looked away just as quickly. He was yet to tell her he was Dev. And she was yet to tell him she knew who he was.

Her eyes welled at that fact, and she instead smiled broadly at Shaheer.

“How are you Bhabhi?”

“I’m good.”

She wanted to ask him if he knew who he was. He must to, she had left a letter for her husband.

But she frowned when her sister’s gaze met with Shaheer’s and she instantly blushed when he held the door open for her.

It was then that Chandini’s gaze fell on the delicate string of black beads around Shikha’s neck and she gasped.

“My husband.” Biting into her lip, Shikha blushed, and Chandini widened her eyes from Shikha to Shaheer. Her Shikha was married, and not just to anyone but to Veer, to another Kashyap. She was not just her sister, but her co-sister-in-law too. She was her Devrani.

Her joy knew no bounds. She wanted to yell and scream from rooftops, that her Shikha was her Janaki Maa’s bahu, that she was her devrani.

She instantly glanced at her husband again, but her heart stopped in her chest the moment her gaze met with his. And her tears too remained arrested in her eyes.

Devrani? A rueful chuckle escaped her lips, as she slowly got into the car, and waited for Advay to close the door.

As her gaze met with him again for a beat, reality crashed around her. Her Dev was now a married man. She wasn’t a Kashyap bahu anymore, she wasn’t his wife, and she definitely wasn’t Shikha’s jethani.

She wanted to burst into a loud sob.

Instead in a bid to comfort herself, she fondly stroked the hair of the other child who had fallen asleep in Shikha’s arms. Wife, or not, she was the mother to his beautiful daughters, and that was all that mattered to her now.

When the car began to move and she sat back, she found Veer gazing at her with warm puppy eyes.

“How have you been?” She pinched his cheek fondly. “How are your parents?”

“They’re good.” He took her hand into his, and kissed the back of her hand, before touching it to his eyes. “Thank you.”

She nodded, fully aware of what he was thanking her for.

“Did you not move to the US with Dev?” With scorn in her voice, she flickered her eyes to the man behind the wheel, and shivered when his eyes shot to hers hers. Despite his sunglasses she could feel his gaze searing through her from the reflection of the rear-view mirror.

“Naa Bhabhi.” Veer shrugged. “For me India is the best.”

She nodded, gazing at him with all the love in her heart, and asked, “So what do you do now?”

“I freelance with Nat geo. I also made short films…..and when I’m not doing all that, I work alongside Bhai.” He smiled at Advay.

“And I hope you’re taking good care of my sister.” She leaned to kiss her sister’s cheek again.

“Oh! Bhabhi,” he glanced at her the moment they drove out of the main town.

“Straight ahead.” Although speaking to Veer, she peeked at the dark eyes of the man in the rear view mirror. “Right at end of the road. And another right.”

Ten minute later, once they parked inside the compound of her building, Chandini leaned back and blew out a sigh, wondering what he would make of the place she lived in. She had done her best to provide a reasonably comfortable life for her children, but she was no Advay Singh Raizada. And this was no Kashyap Haveli.

Fidgeting with her dupatta, she stroked the hair of the child in her arms, struggling to calm her heart. She had never felt this nervous in her life. And she feared he might tell her off for not having done enough for their children.

Trembling, her moist eyes met with his, as soon as he opened the car.

“Its a safe residential area,” she whispered when he put his hand out for her.

And when he frowned, she continued, “Don’t mind the peeling paint and the mould on walls, we have torrential rainfall here.”

Given how he further narrowed his eyes, she knew she should shut up, but she continued blabbering, “The shops are close, its easy for me. The bus-stop too is just opposite the gate. And Bimla chachi, my child-minder, she lives on the ground floor.”

Advay gave her a single nod, and stretched his hands out for her again.

Her gaze flickered from his arms to his gaze, not knowing what it was he was suggesting.

Did he want her in his arms? Her heart fainted. But she slapped it back to life, to the reality of their dynamic, and realised he was perhaps asking for her child.

She clutched tighter to her daughter, not wanting to part with her, ever. But given how she had to hop out of a vehicle with a peacefully sleeping child in her arms, while ensuring she didn’t trip on her saree and fall face-forward, which she knew she would, given how clumsy she was, especially in the presence of her dark deadly Master, she reluctantly handed her daughter to him. And smiled the moment she heard him crush the child to his heart and sigh heavily.

As soon as she reached for the edge of the door, he stretched out a hand for her again.

Blinking at his palm, she stopped, a decision had to be made. Her brow arched, her heart nudged, her mind glowered.

The decision was made. She couldn’t touch him, or she’d find herself on her knees, pleading with him to love her again.

Her pride intact, she raised her head. And reaching for the edge of the dupatta, she covered it over her shoulder and hopped out of the car effortlessly. And instantly patted herself, for not having tripped over the saree and made a complete fool out of herself.

With his hand still stretched in front of him, Advay blew out all the air in his lungs, the moment she flicked her hair behind her back, and brushed past him.

Yet, he couldn’t help close his eyes and sigh again, at how sweet her hair had felt against his cheek. And how long it had been since he had felt those silken tresses tickle him again.

He knew she had to be furious at him, given she hadn’t contacted him for so long.

And now he wasn’t sure how to approach her after the kind of cold shoulder she was giving him ever since she had stepped into the car.

Did she not realise the hell she had put him through over the last four years?

But when he stroked his child, his heart squeezed at the kind of hell he had put her through.

Despite everything he had said and done, she had at least handed his daughter to him.

And as he kissed the forehead of the sleeping child in his arms, tears welled his eyes. His wife was not just alive, he was a father to two beautiful girls, identical twins, his heart corrected. Fuck! If he was complaining.

He deserved her anger, her hate too. And even if she showed him the door, then that was fair too.

And he would stand at a distance and watch her for the rest of his life, he vowed as he followed her into the building she and the others had disappeared into.

His mind made a mental surveillance of the area. It was an old three storied building on a crammed-up street. There was another identical building opposite the one that Chandini entered which shared the same compound wall.

As he followed the others, he could hear Shikha huffing puffing, and he chuckled knowing well how much she hated stairs.

Third floor, and he finally stopped just behind his brother, who was holding on to the other child, while Chandini fidgeted with the keys.

As she stood in front of the door, and blew out a heavy breath, it was obvious she was contemplating on whether to let them in or not.

He waited, to see what she’d do. And smiled when she finally twisted the key and opened the door.

Turning around, she reached for the child in Veer’s arms and walked into the flat, and straight into the another room.

While Shikha collapsed on the sofa and panted, Advay was the last to step inside.

It was a tiny flat, with the kitchen living and dining all open plan. The kitchen island separated it from the rest of the room. A sofa set made of two two-seater sofa and an extra chair was crammed to one side. And a four seater dining table rested against the wall opposite the sofa.

There was a small television on the wall he noticed.

And once Veer opened the door behind the sofa, he smiled to see that it opened out on a tiny balcony, with a couple of pots, a tulsi, and a rose, and something else he didn’t recognise.

With off-white walls, and mis-matched curtains, it was a quirky little apartment, but it was spotlessly clean, and so homely, he couldn’t help sigh at how warm and cozy it felt. But most of all it was the place where his wife was now, and his children too.

It was bigger than the studio he, Sid, Murli and his ultra-rich Karan had once shared. And he could see himself living here. In fact, he wanted to move in here without wasting another minute.

But he had a lot of stuff at the place he was renting, and he didn’t even know why he needed all that stuff. He had everything he’d ever wanted, here, in this beautiful home, with his wife beside him, and with his children in him arms.

As he continued contemplating on that thought, and kept admiring every part of her little flat, his gaze flickered to the room inside, and he caught a dazzling white shirt the moment Chandini opened the door. His heart stopped, once and for all. And the reality of their situation descended upon him.

She was married. To another man.

He glanced at the child in his arms again, and frowned at their names. Why would they have his name? Nothing made sense, but they were his daughters there was no question there.

Once Chandini strode back to him, he handed the child in his arms with a heavy heart, and sighed again, when his arms felt empty. He was loving the warmth of his blood against his heart.

Yet, the sight of the sindoor in his wife’s parting turned his heart ice-cold, and the thought of some other man having touched her, kissed her, loved her, sent his blood boiling in his veins.

Suddenly, he felt like an intruder. And now it made sense why she hadn’t contacted him. He wanted to wreck the place, he wanted to shake her, to take her, to claim her back his.

But as his tears streamed, not knowing what to do, or where to sit, he walked out onto the balcony, to make a metal note of the area, to also calm his raging heart.

He had no right on her. He had lost it all after what he had done, he snapped at himself. But he had to ensure his girls were safe and happy.

Sniffling, he glanced around.

The building in the front was way too close for his liking, in fact, so close he could probably put a ladder across and walk into the opposite balcony. It annoyed him. The thought of some random person living this close to his wife and children.

What kind of a man allowed his family to life in a house like this? A dark rage took over him, and he decided to wait for this worthless husband of hers to turn up, so he could give him a black eye, perhaps break his jaw too, and every finger that had touched his beautiful wife.

But given how dark and dusty the flat opposite hers seemed, it was obvious it was empty.

Thank god, he though, thankful again there was no terrace on the roof of either buildings, which meant no one was looking into his wife’s flat.

That was another sigh of relief.

As his gaze travelled down, it was a narrow alley, with just enough parking for four vehicles…not that there was any other vehicle parked ..other than his black BMW.

A few old worn out cycles leaned against the building wall. Clothes hung from the strings in balconies. And the distant hum of the Ganga aarti could be heard from over the light buzzing traffic, along with a occasional honking of a bike.

A radio played somewhere and an occasional foreigner with ill-fitted Om printed clothes, and matted hair strolled passed along the side-street.

It was a quiet residential area, he realised, with families that had probably lived together for generations.

The mountains in the backdrop gave an authentic feel to the quaint yet bustling town, with the ganges gushing across right through the heart, almost cutting it in the centre, only to be conjoined together by the Ram jhula and the Laxman jhula that he could see at a distance.

He was in Dev Bhoomi, Rishikesh. And it felt like it was Dev Bhoomi for once.

“Jiju.” He turned at Shikha’s whisper. “Sorry she made you coffee.”

“Its fine.” The fact it was made by his wife, he could even drink a bottle of bleach if she was to hand it to him.

“Are you not going to speak to her?” He looked away, not wanting to ever ask his wife who she was living with now. It was best he never found out, for his own sanity, and for the other man’s safety.

“I saw that shirt too. In fact, there are a pair of shoes at the entrance.”

Advay narrowed his eyes, annoyed he had missed that little detail.

“Talk to her.”

“Hmm.”

“Hmm matlab?” She glowered. “Yes. No. Maybe. You are so ridiculous sometimes.”

“Leave it.”

“What?”

“I am glad she hasn’t kicked me out till now.” He glared back at her. “If one evening is all I get with my family. Fine. So be it.”

“To hell with you.” Glowering at him, she strode back, but he couldn’t help continue to sip on the bitter coffee with a sulk.

___

Yet, his gaze travelled to his wife, who was now sat on the sofa opposite Shikha and Veer and smiling at them.

After making all sort of random talks, Advay stiffened when she asked, “How is Maa?”

Shikha stiffened too, and he gave her a nod when she flickered her gaze to him.

“Hmm…Maa is okay.” Shikha shrugged. “I have been away too….just came back from London.”

Advay chuckled at what a white lie that was. In fact, he was surprised Chandini hadn’t caught her sister’s lie given how white Shikha had turned.

But his beautiful girl was lost, he smirked to himself, when she stole another furtive glance at him from the corner of her eyes.

“How is Meghu, Sid Bhaiyya and his parents.”

“Don’t ..…”

“They’re fine.” He sighed at how Veer clutched tight to Shikha’s hand and smiled, when Shikha almost snapped at her sister.

The small talk continued, with talks on weather, the river, the difference between living in Prayag and in Rishikesh, and Advay kept smiling and sighing at how sweet she sounded, yet he couldn’t help take pride in how confident too she sounded.

His gaze roamed all over her, at leisure. Four and a half years, yet she was still his mesmerising beauty. He chuckled at how she kept fidgeting, fully aware of his gaze on her. That was the connection they had, she knew what was on his mind, and he knew what was on hers. Until she had changed it all that fateful morning. And that morning he had questioned if he had ever known her at all. Perhaps he didn’t, he realised.

He had always doubted her ability to live without him. But given how well she had single-handedly brought their children up, he shook his head at how he had underestimated her. She was way more stronger than any woman he’d known. Perhaps stronger than his mother too.

“When did you both marry?” She finally asked, and he felt another pinch at the way Shikha and Veer had married.

“Seven months and two weeks.” Both Shikha and Veer chimed together.

And he smiled at how his brother twined his fingers into a blushing Shikha’s hand, and kissed her fondly on her temple, before holding her gaze in his warm brown eyes.

He longed too, to hold his wife’s gaze like that.

His eyes slowly travelled to Chandini, but he felt a stab in his gut to find her furiously blinking at her tears.

He watched her like a hawk, of how her eyes rested on the hands of their siblings twined together, and then moved up to the way they had locked their gazes, not in lust but in pure love.

He watched how defeated she looked, and lost too, as slowly gathered all the cups, and staggered back into the kitchen.

He felt another stab, when her tears rolled down her cheeks as she slowly raised her eyes to him.

They held their gaze for a few moments, but she had said everything he hadn’t wanted to hear. He felt another whiplash against his gut. Guilt corroded him at how he had robbed her of a marriage, and of the love too that she deserved. He had not just broken her heart, but had crushed her soul too.

Unable to hold her questioning eyes, he slowly turned around, and kept his gaze to the empty void before him, gazing into the oblivion of the perfect life he had once had on the palm of his hand, and had lost it all thanks to his own foolishness.

Once he turned, Chandini kept her gaze on his broad back, while sniffling back her tears.

She didn’t know what had come over her. But seeing Shikha and Veer cuddle and gaze with so much love had made her heart ache for the life that was lost to her.

Dev, her heart whispered to him. She wanted to tell him she was sorry. How she had ruined everything, or they could have been as madly in love all their lives.

But she deserved his indifference, his hate too. And all of his anger.

Wiping her face, she turned around too. For four and half years she had thought of what she’d say when she’d see Dev again. But now that he was here, standing in her balcony, with his back turned to her, no amount of apology could make right the terrible crime she had committed.

She had long resigned herself to a solitary life. She didn’t deserve love, or happiness. And she was happy to know he was happy. And wasn’t sure why he had been gazing at her with such scalding eyes, given he had wife now.

Yet, in the few brief moments that she had admired him, he had looked pale, she had noted. Perhaps he was exhausted. Or perhaps marriage had made him lethargic. She chuckled at that thought. He was never a man for marriage. A dark master who must be finding it impossible to bow before his wife.

His wife, the word sliced through her heart, like it had for the last four and a half years.

A right that was once hers. Or maybe it never was.

As her tears slid down again, “Maa.” Her daughter’s voice made her stiffen.

A smile kissed her mouth, and she quickly wiped her face.

Wife or not, she had her daughters, and she was so glad they were finally awake. Now she could cuddle them, and soothe the ache of her heart, like she always had.

_____